Funny Birthday Cards For Women

I need something funny to put in my birthday card from friends. It is currently 17, we like stupid jokes, and all quotes birthday that I found are all really stupid 30 year and women. I need something funny. Ideas?

Since you are 30 (and you know better), and it is 17 I think it would be funny to have a blank card and write in it,

So I found myself in a long line to buy this card you. The person in front of pay has been taken forever. Need a price check, card was declined, could not find the exact change, began to write a check, there were no other lines open, would not wait any longer .. ..... So I stole it! LOL!

You could ad things and go on and on with things the person did drive you to the abandonment and steal.

I would like to laugh!

Just an idea.

Good luck!